Of course, as with any ambitious TfL project, it’s late. Installation was initially slated for 2019, but the first section of the network to get 4G coverage – the eastern edges of the Jubilee line, you lucky things! – won’t be online until March. Even that isn’t going to be a 4G blanket; arriving in fits and starts, the stretch from Westminster to Canning Town will have it first (except for London Bridge and Waterloo stations), with tunnels, platforms, and ticket halls soon to be fully connected.

After that, the rollout plan gets a little murkier. We already knew that Crossrail was going to have it, although I think we should just agree to not talk about that for now. The “mid-2020s” is the date given for Total 4G, but if the whole network is done by December 31st, 2025, I’ll be pleasantly surprised. The Standard would have you believe that engineers are working weeknights to lay cables, though we all know the process involves ancient incantations and other heretofore banned magic of the night, fit to bring such dark technological wizardry deep beneath the ground.

In any event, this spells doom for the last remaining obvious time to read a book, just have a think about things, or stare aimlessly at the floor – say hello to refreshing Instagram, Facebook and Twitter on repeat for another 25 – 30 minutes! Hey, at least with us all gazing into our screens, it’ll be easier than ever to avoid eye contact…